sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jun 29, 2007 8:02:31 GMT
A jolly (soggy) good morning to all! I'm a newbie, so, if this is flying too close to the wind, I apologise and would ask to be corrected on the level of rudeness! But I love to write limericks (some are better than others), so thought I'd start a thread with this; The literate young scholar, Miss Cameter, In ways of the flesh was no amateur, She'd recite in the nude Verse quite shockingly crude, But in perfect iambic pentameter.
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Post by adamzappel on Jun 29, 2007 9:18:03 GMT
More Sita, more.
That's only a 3 on the Rudeometer, so you're well in the red (as opposed to the blue)
A hearty welcome to the madness. Hotel California. 'Nuff said.
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sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jun 29, 2007 10:30:41 GMT
Cheers, Adam! ;D
I'll try to shove a few more up when I'm not supposed to be working (smacked wrists all round for internet playtime on work's hours!).
In the meantime, everyone else chip in! I'm all for a free for all!
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Post by adamzappel on Jun 29, 2007 11:27:00 GMT
There was a young lady called Sita Whose poems could have been neater Right number of lines And accurate rhymes But the scanning appears to have beaten her
Not really Sita!! ;D
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sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jun 29, 2007 12:00:27 GMT
Cheeky! A passionate soul writing ditties Asked 'Why do you think, Lord, that it is, With words I impart, I can touch her pure heart, Yet I can't get my hands on her ... Hmmm. Don't know. What do you think? Trust fund? ;D
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Post by adamzappel on Jun 29, 2007 12:02:43 GMT
Cheeky! A passionate soul writing ditties Asked 'Why do you think, Lord, that it is, With words I impart, I can touch her pure heart, Yet I can't get my hands on her ... Hmmm. Don't know. What do you think? Trust fund? ;D Ass ets?
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jun 29, 2007 17:51:42 GMT
equities?
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sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jun 30, 2007 14:10:34 GMT
Heh heh heh! Very good!
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Post by adamzappel on Jun 30, 2007 16:51:42 GMT
A young girl whose name was Mappants Lived a long way away down in Hants She spent time writing rhyme Drinking Vodka & Lime And married a man name of Lance
Come on Sita, you have to do better than this! Sorry if I've moved you round the country a bit - it's a rhyming thing. Sorry to Lance if it's a surprise to him!!
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sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jul 2, 2007 7:53:40 GMT
A broke drunken fool name of Graeme Ran up bar bills but never could paeme. He declared 'It's the pits! If I only had tits, I could charge fifty quid to displaeme!'
Naughty but (I hope) nice! Graeme's a bloke that I work with - he tried not to laugh at this, but it didn't work, I'm happy to say!
Or, for something less rude;
An unscrupulous man from Darjeeling Made a stack on his stock-market dealing. But his insider-trading Now leaves him degrading In a cell, tracing cracks on the ceiling.
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Post by territalks on Jul 2, 2007 8:30:46 GMT
I love limmerics please keep them comming. Love TT xxxx
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sitamappants
Apprentice TOG
nil illegitimi carborundum
Posts: 80
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Post by sitamappants on Jul 2, 2007 11:54:36 GMT
Cheers, TT - I'll do my best, as, I'm sure, will the other budding limericists (created word, sorry) on board!
How about;
There was a young man from Darjeeling Who wanted to sit on the ceiling, But he couldn't adhere So he drank fizzy beer - Now he's farting and floating and reeling!
For pressing the toilet-humour button!
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Post by adamzappel on Jul 2, 2007 12:02:34 GMT
How about some limericks about some of our famous TOGs, Sita?
Michael is our Baptist Minister A caring soul and nothing sinister Our haven is his Rect'ry Board A welcome there is quite assured Hope and Care he will administer
What rhymes with Sturbs, I wonder?
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Post by territalks on Jul 2, 2007 20:04:44 GMT
What indeed Adam! I wait with baited breath!! Love TT xxxx
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Post by adamzappel on Jul 3, 2007 7:29:08 GMT
What indeed Adam! I wait with baited breath!! Love TT xxxx Come on, Terri, your turn!! (hint: Herbs rhymes with Sturbs and so does 'Burbs, but you'll need a third for a limerick, won't you?) Curbs!!!
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Post by Nuala Bowtitt on Jul 3, 2007 17:22:54 GMT
Hi Sita
Love the limericks - so clever.
Terri - this one's for you
That Master of websites, Mick Sturbs While at school had a problem with verbs His weird conjugations Defied explanations. He cured it by eating some herbs.
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Post by territalks on Jul 3, 2007 17:27:34 GMT
Hey Adam Why not YOU my man! I love Limericks but I am not good at putting them into works I know I will ask Nuala!!!! Love TT xxxx
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Post by territalks on Jul 3, 2007 17:53:21 GMT
Hi Nuala See The above post! You must be a mind reader!!!! Love TT xxxx
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Post by adamzappel on Jul 3, 2007 19:44:13 GMT
Hi Nuala See The above post! You must be a mind reader!!!! Love TT xxxx Terri, Mind reader? Just one of Nuala's gifts!
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Post by Nuala Bowtitt on Jul 3, 2007 20:14:10 GMT
You're next Adam....... xxx
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