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Post by Mad Sapper on Jan 28, 2010 15:27:12 GMT
There was a young feller called Haydon who on getting off with a maiden put his hand up her skirt when he started to flirt but the field had been previously played on.
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Post by Mad Sapper on Jan 28, 2010 15:28:49 GMT
a cunning young man name of peter who when forced to invest in a litre of oil said it's not that the price is too hot but I only wanted a metre
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Post by Mae Hem on Feb 1, 2010 11:21:52 GMT
You'll have heard of Miss Tuffet's big Spider Who descended to sit down besides 'er There's more to the tale He'd been drinking Real Ale And she had been quaffing the Cider
They swapped drunken tales and got tiddly And found that they both liked Bo Diddley They had a bit of a grope And decided to elope But not with each other - are you kiddley?
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Post by Mad Sapper on Feb 2, 2010 9:46:34 GMT
hur hur hur.
A strapping young feller called Tim who was large both in girth & in limb raised his eyes to the skies when asked who ate those pies? And said it weren't I it were him.
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Post by Mae Hem on Feb 3, 2010 9:07:54 GMT
There was a young lady from Kirklees Had a pair of enormous sized knees Men oft stopped to stare My word, what a pair! She said they were a pressy from the bees
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Post by Mad Sapper on Feb 3, 2010 9:53:46 GMT
right. A winsey young girl named Elain complained every day of a pain in her side on the right which made her want to fight she said ouch, there it did it again!
Oh Muse wherefore art thou?
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Post by Mae Hem on Feb 5, 2010 8:44:07 GMT
he he he
O'Muse is in Limerick on a break They told him a rest he must take To write verses so bad Takes energy by gad So go take a rest for our sake
(alternative last line - so he sulked and jumped into a lake)
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Post by Mad Sapper on Feb 9, 2010 12:36:22 GMT
A charming young thing, name of Mae got giggly one sunny day when a man on a ladder got bolder & badder and catching her hold said "wey hey!"
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Post by Mae Hem on Feb 17, 2010 10:03:10 GMT
An invisible user she yearned for a mate It's sad, she was so desperate to go on a date But when she uncloaked The poor bloke he choked And didn't stop running 'til eight
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Post by Mad Sapper on Feb 22, 2010 14:08:52 GMT
I sit here & work all the time, to try and make all my stuff rhyme, I couldn't get better, with each passing letter I've gone from just good to sublime
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Post by paul Zernikazof on Mar 3, 2010 17:51:27 GMT
A poet called Mad and a poet called Mae Went into the woods one fine sunny day Her heart went a flutter as in her ear he did mutter What it was I really can't say
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Post by Mae Hem on Mar 5, 2010 11:05:10 GMT
Mad, May and PZ wrote their verses The rhyming couldn't be that much worses Oh where is that Lou He's gorn missing too Perhaps we should send for some nurses?
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Post by Mad Sapper on Mar 11, 2010 12:24:22 GMT
A limerick true to it's type will never create too much hype, this rhymes just for you, cos I haven't a clue who this Lou is (isn't that tripe?).
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Post by Lou Briccant on Mar 16, 2010 21:32:37 GMT
Lou Briccant is an oiler of note, Some say he's a bit of a poet, And when push comes to shove, He's just a normal guy, Gov. But sometimes he's brains are afloat.
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Post by Mae Hem on Mar 23, 2010 12:52:07 GMT
A young poet got terribly terse He wanted to marry a nurse The Vicar did shout As the marriage lines he read out 'Do you want her for better or verse?'
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Post by Lou Briccant on May 4, 2010 17:14:42 GMT
A young married nurse struck a pose, When her man, who was prone to write prose, Didn't bother to tell her He'd run off with a feller, And he even pinched her black hose.
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Post by Mae Hem on May 8, 2010 9:06:16 GMT
I went to the polls today Cast my vote and I toddled away It might not be used Because I was very confused There was no section that said vote for Mae
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Post by Lou Briccant on May 18, 2010 22:58:01 GMT
It looks like Mad, Mae and PZ, Have all decided to flee, So with all my might, I'll get this rhyme right, Then I'll go and have me some tea.
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Post by Mae Hem on Jun 10, 2010 9:22:16 GMT
The tumbleweed is rolling gently through the halls Of the FML board 'midst ghostly haunting calls We are in need of good rhymers Where are all the Old Timers? Maehap it's because me limericks are a load of old................... ;D
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Post by Mae's Grannie Annie on Jun 15, 2011 19:06:17 GMT
The Limerickicist gave plenty of curses He wanted to write proper verses 'I think and I ponder And still I do wonder Why are they all about doctors and nurses?'
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