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Post by idiotmittens on Jul 23, 2009 12:11:03 GMT
Buy one, get one free? BBC ClickyKeeping up with the times, or desperate measures?
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Post by Glen B Ogle on Jul 23, 2009 18:45:39 GMT
I've got very mixed feelings about this. If there are so many requests for this it strongly suggests people are wanting Church weddings and infant baptisms for the wrong reasons.
Glen
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Post by revmichael on Jul 24, 2009 6:32:00 GMT
I've got very mixed feelings about this. If there are so many requests for this it strongly suggests people are wanting Church weddings and infant baptisms for the wrong reasons. Glen One of our Church Wardens believes that because Weddings have turned out to be so expensive many couples do not get married until the first child is born; they then have the baptism and a huge Christening party (instead of a wedding reception). My cynical thought was, when I heard the news, why don't they have a combined wedding, baptism and divorce ceremony all in one go - and save the expense!
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Post by Fi on Jul 27, 2009 13:57:44 GMT
Your church warden may well be right - what I would ask is why weddings have to be so expensive - there is so much emphasis placed on the wedding these days that the lifelong commitment that is entailed in the wedding vows is in great danger of being lost, although it's worth noting that 66% of marriages, religious or civil are still "till death do us part". To go back to IM's original post, I think the CofE has lost its way and yes, it may be desperate measures, but they won't do much good. The CofE may be the established church, but I think I'm right in saying that it now has no more members than the Roman Catholic Church, which, right or wrong, has remained far more conservative in its thinking. Years ago I went to a cousin's kirk wedding - there were no babies involved, but it was well known that the couple had lived together before the wedding. So the minister delivered a no holds barred address about the pitfalls of sex outside marriage as well as the blessings that come with marriage. It wasn't offensive, it was a simple declaration about moral values as defined in the bible. I was rather taken aback, but then I thought that, if the couple wanted to be married by him, in his kirk, then it was not unreasonable of the minister to offer his opinions and remind the congregation of biblical teachings. It was, after all, his job. The couple said exactly the same later and assured me that it had not spoiled "their day" - and we all agreed that we respected his frankness. The CofE is, I think, will lose far more members because of this latest compromise with modernity than it will gain from couples who choose to take advantage of it.
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Post by Beau Leggs on Jul 27, 2009 14:22:31 GMT
Some Church of Scotland ministers require at least one of the couple to attend the church for a few months prior to the minister giving his consent. They also do the same if parents want their child baptised.
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Post by idiotmittens on Jul 28, 2009 12:05:43 GMT
How many people get married in church simply for the photo album and the chance to say it's a 'Proper Wedding'? Most I would suspect, these days.
Simply turning up for a few Sunday's beforehand just to get consent seems even worse than just admitting they want a nice venue.
I had both my weddings in a Register Office (some years apart!!!) because I just couldn't do the 'God' bit, even if it was for a nice photo.
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Post by troykerr on Jul 28, 2009 16:28:30 GMT
Cynic - you never. Seriously you can get a 'nice' photo album without the church thing. Also I do wish that folks would accept that weddings do not need to cost the earth. Our album was courtesy of PhotoBox [though we did have a proper wedding photographer as we did not want to out the resonsibility onto a friend]. My son and his wife did a great combined marriage/honeymoon in Cyprus followed by a reception back here for the massed family and friends and all for a third to a fifth of costs of friends weddings.
Finally - a lovely couple decided they could not afford to wed as their friends were spending in the region of £25,000 for a wedding etc. When their partnership (of plus 20 years) was brought to an abrupt end by a car crash his father took total charge ignoring his son's wish to not be buried in a churchyard and my friend's daughter was all but excluded from the funeral arrangements.
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