Post by Nick O. Teen on Apr 29, 2010 14:19:21 GMT
Young Johnny is 16, and he's just started his first proper job in a department store in Newcastle.
It's Friday morning, and he's summoned to the Manager's office at eight o'clock sharp.
"Right, bonny lad", says the manager, "you've done your induction, paperwork, health an' safety an' arl that, now I want you out on the shop floor, larnin' to sell. I'll be putting you with George. He's our top salesman, he's got twenty-odd year in the business, knars his stuff, he could sell sand to the Arabs. He's in Home and Garden. Bank Holiday weekend comin' up, yuz're ganna be busy....go on! Off you go, kiddar, we're oppen at haff-past!"
Johnny scoots down to Home and Garden, where George is just letting in the day's first customer, with a cheery "Morning, sir!"
"Good morning", says the customer, "I'm after some grass seed, please, could you show me.....?"
"Wey, sartinly, sir", says George. He winks at Johnny and takes the customer off.
Fifteen minutes later the customer reappears, carrying a pack of grass seed - and some lawn food, a hose reel, and a tap kit. George follows the customer with a huge box marked 'LAWNMOWER DELUXE". The customer pays and off they go.
George returns moments later; Johnny is dumbstruck with admiration..."Wowww! How did you do that, George?"
"Easy, kid", replies George, "just anticipate what your customer needs, and supply it. Like that fella there, he's buying grass seed, so he's planting a lawn. So he needs to feed it, water it, and...what else?"
"Cut it!" exclaims Johnny.
"Aye", George continues, "and them Deluxe mowers are half-price this weekend, and I'm going to sell 'em all! So are you. So you take the next customer. OK?"
Ten minutes later, in comes a man in a hurry. Johnny approaches him, and the man says "Quick...I need some..errr...you know (whispers) sanitary towel thingies for the missus...show uz where they are, would you, sunshine?"
"Certainly sir, follow me", replies Johnny, "and can I interest you in a Deluxe lawnmower, half price this weekend only?"
"Lawnmower? Lawnmower? What the hell would I want with a lawnmower?"
"Wey," replies Johnny, "yer weekend's knacked, sir. Might as well cut the grass!"
It's Friday morning, and he's summoned to the Manager's office at eight o'clock sharp.
"Right, bonny lad", says the manager, "you've done your induction, paperwork, health an' safety an' arl that, now I want you out on the shop floor, larnin' to sell. I'll be putting you with George. He's our top salesman, he's got twenty-odd year in the business, knars his stuff, he could sell sand to the Arabs. He's in Home and Garden. Bank Holiday weekend comin' up, yuz're ganna be busy....go on! Off you go, kiddar, we're oppen at haff-past!"
Johnny scoots down to Home and Garden, where George is just letting in the day's first customer, with a cheery "Morning, sir!"
"Good morning", says the customer, "I'm after some grass seed, please, could you show me.....?"
"Wey, sartinly, sir", says George. He winks at Johnny and takes the customer off.
Fifteen minutes later the customer reappears, carrying a pack of grass seed - and some lawn food, a hose reel, and a tap kit. George follows the customer with a huge box marked 'LAWNMOWER DELUXE". The customer pays and off they go.
George returns moments later; Johnny is dumbstruck with admiration..."Wowww! How did you do that, George?"
"Easy, kid", replies George, "just anticipate what your customer needs, and supply it. Like that fella there, he's buying grass seed, so he's planting a lawn. So he needs to feed it, water it, and...what else?"
"Cut it!" exclaims Johnny.
"Aye", George continues, "and them Deluxe mowers are half-price this weekend, and I'm going to sell 'em all! So are you. So you take the next customer. OK?"
Ten minutes later, in comes a man in a hurry. Johnny approaches him, and the man says "Quick...I need some..errr...you know (whispers) sanitary towel thingies for the missus...show uz where they are, would you, sunshine?"
"Certainly sir, follow me", replies Johnny, "and can I interest you in a Deluxe lawnmower, half price this weekend only?"
"Lawnmower? Lawnmower? What the hell would I want with a lawnmower?"
"Wey," replies Johnny, "yer weekend's knacked, sir. Might as well cut the grass!"