Courgettes

[meltemi]

Is it me? have I lost It?
I thought there was a thread here yesrerday re courgettes.
How do I get mine to have sex? normally they out-pace me, but this year its the converse.
these well fed, well watered, well drained pair in dappled sunny, sheltered corner are having lots of female flowers & the occasional male flower-but not on the same day.
Their predecessors have fed the neighbourhood, a reputation is at stake...is consignment to the great compost heap in the sky the best answer?

[territalks]

Hi Mel

Sorry I know nothing about courgetts except how to eat them. Are they similar to cucumbers. Maybe you need bees to pollenate them!

Love

TT xxxx

[Fi]

meltemi said:

Is it me? have I lost It?
I thought there was a thread here yesrerday re courgettes.
How do I get mine to have sex? normally they out-pace me, but this year its the converse.
these well fed, well watered, well drained pair in dappled sunny, sheltered corner are having lots of female flowers & the occasional male flower-but not on the same day.
Their predecessors have fed the neighbourhood, a reputation is at stake...is consignment to the great compost heap in the sky the best answer?

Mel, try hand pollinating. Just take the petals off a male flower to expose the anthers, which have the pollen on, and then wipe them on the middle on the sticky bit above the ovary of the female flowers (sorry, I can't remember what it's called). That will pollinate them.
And, just a thought but, if you have a lot of flowers, try stuffing them - there are lots of recipes to be found by googling and many are delicious.

[meltemi]

Dear Fi
thank you for the reply.
just like all good sex guides this bit's called...it goes...then this happens...(yuk).
The problem is only male flowers one day & only female flowers another day, but not both on the same day-a prerequisite for reproduction, I'm told.
I get up, wonder out into the garden early each morning (not always a pretty sight, may be an all-over tan one day, but then its too cold). thren e-mail her @ work. her department await the result with great expectation on a daily basis.

[Fi]

meltemi said:

Dear Fi
thank you for the reply.
just like all good sex guides this bit's called...it goes...then this happens...(yuk).
The problem is only male flowers one day & only female flowers another day, but not both on the same day-a prerequisite for reproduction, I'm told.
I get up, wonder out into the garden early each morning (not always a pretty sight, may be an all-over tan one day, but then its too cold). thren e-mail her @ work. her department await the result with great expectation on a daily basis.

You have three options - one - keep the male flowers, making sure that they are ripe enough to be producing pollen - if so, they'll be good for a day or three.
Two - talk 'dirty' to the plants - that might give them a good idea of why they're there.
Three - threaten it with a damn good beating.
*grins*

[lily]

Funnily enough we usually have more than we can eat and come back from hols to marrows, but it's the same here this year! *tootles off to try a bit of stern talking*

xxx

[carlott]

fi said:

meltemi said:

Two - talk 'dirty' to the plants - that might give them a good idea of why they're there.
Three - threaten it with a damn good beating.
*grins*

[/color][/quote]Or try taking them on a helicopter ride it works for Tracy Emin or so she would have us believe.

[tigerlily]

But how do you know which are the boy flowers and which are the girl flowers?

[Fi]

tigerlily said:

But how do you know which are the boy flowers and which are the girl flowers?

The boy flowers are blue and the girl flowers are pink.


For those who are unfortunately colourblind however, the girl flowers by by the little baby courgettes behing the flowers. The boy flowers just have a stalk.

[Axle Grease]

fi said:

tigerlily said:

But how do you know which are the boy flowers and which are the girl flowers?

The boy flowers are blue and the girl flowers are pink.


For those who are unfortunately colourblind however, the girl flowers by by the little baby courgettes behing the flowers. The boy flowers just have a stalk.

I must be a boy flower then.

*wonders where Tigerlily has hidden her courgette*

We've not been able to get to the allotment as frequently as the last couple of years and now have more marrows than courgettes. We have also noticed that there are fewer courgettes this year. I think they were held back by the cold snap we had in June.


[/i][/b]

[lily]

fi said:

tigerlily said:

But how do you know which are the boy flowers and which are the girl flowers?

The boy flowers are blue and the girl flowers are pink.


For those who are unfortunately colourblind however, the girl flowers by by the little baby courgettes behing the flowers. The boy flowers just have a stalk.

Stalk as in no petals

xxx

[meltemi]

Hi Fi & one and all
perhaps the boy flowers would look good in a blue vase,would an asprin in their water help?
or should be on the pillow alongside? Do flowers get headaches?
I will try "the good talking to", the one on the birds & bees failed miserably with these courgettes, but then it failed when I was only a father. as a grandfather i will be safely excused this whith the minis. Now the little horrors are going down with mildew...or failing that they are sugar frosted.
Regards meltemi, the etesian wind blowing steadily south

[Fi]

Our courgettes are the same as everyone else. Loads of male flowers plus a few females. Like a number of others, I think it's something to do with weather that cannot make its mind up whether it's spring summer or autumn.

[meltemi]

Hi Fi
Up early as usual. out of sheer desperation unwraped yesterday's best boy flower & presented it to todays only female flower. only time will tell if he is past his prime & firing blanks. in the meantime its off to Sainsbugs to buy some courgettes. The neighbours are gettting restless due to going cold-turkey for my courgettes.

[Fi]

meltemi said:

Hi Fi
Up early as usual. out of sheer desperation unwraped yesterday's best boy flower & presented it to todays only female flower. only time will tell if he is past his prime & firing blanks. in the meantime its off to Sainsbugs to buy some courgettes. The neighbours are gettting restless due to going cold-turkey for my courgettes.

Hmmmmm, there's nothing like a bit of early morning how's your father. *grins* I hope it works.
The alternative, of course, would be to tie the Sainsbugs courgettes to your plants, or is that already part of your cunning plan?
And that reminds me of a vegetable show a few years ago, when one competitor displayed some superb Maris Piper potatoes, that bore a striking resemblance to some I'd seen his wife purchase in Tescos the previous day! I said nothing, but I was sorely tempted.

[meltemi]

Hi Fi
now that's a cunning ploy,one that I had not thought of.
Original plan was to trim the cut ends & mist with cold water-spray...ie fresh picked just for you etc. The wife is now convinced I'm mad. but she likes Wogan very much.
remember it's as etesian wind.

[Fi]

meltemi said:

Hi Fi
now that's a cunning ploy,one that I had not thought of.
Original plan was to trim the cut ends & mist with cold water-spray...ie fresh picked just for you etc. The wife is now convinced I'm mad. but she likes Wogan very much.
remember it's as etesian wind.

Heavens mel, I don't know how long you've been married, but I wonder if the PMM hasn't been entirely open with you in the past. It is the duty of every good wife to assume that her other half is mad. That way they learn to forgive all the irritating little habits that men acquire the moment she says 'I do'. Mine was easy - the day we got married I told him he was mad to marry me, but he insisted, proving what I'd been saying all along. *grins*

[meltemi]

Hi Fi
While this is probably true, up tio now she has given me the benefit of the doubt.
Another bad day in the courgette plot only one solitary, unrequited female flower this morning.
Got off to a late start today due to spending much time in a garden lounger stargazing the Persids...perhaps this put the courgettes off their stroke?
Regards

[Lucy Lastic]

If it's any consolation, after being able to keep a couple of counties supplied with courgettes last year. this year's crop is very poor. The courgettes that have formed are quite small (usually we come back from holiday to marrows!) and hardly worth the effort of picking them. The butternut squash have just no done anything at all - not one single flower amongst them!

[meltemi]

Hi Lucy Lastic
thank you for your commiserations, understand how you feel about the butternuts too.
ER, the memsahibs brother has supplied the second kg of runner beans, but then this is his vegetable-plot forte. he left shaking his head & wringing his hands, no corgettes fot him, not one. The trout are not rising to his thrashings of Rutland water either. so short-term it's hunger all round.