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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 3, 2006 19:36:27 GMT
..the problem being that Julie is not letting the words flow on properly cos the last bit doesn't make sense, so Nobbin takes her to one side and explains about how the words should follow on from one thread to another. Luckily, during this intermission (where everyone goes to the loo and buys their candyfloss) she cottons on and, after being so full of gratitude, gives the ball to Nobbin who, in his infinite wisdom, passes it straight to a......... naturally gifted foopballer, P.D., who with infinite delicacy slides the ball straight into the path of..................
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Post by smiffy on Jan 3, 2006 23:34:45 GMT
an elephant. The elephant lumbers down the field, where he lifts his foot, and with precision of a skilled footballer......
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 4, 2006 18:44:34 GMT
missed an open goal. Throw-in.................
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Post by nobbinthenob on Jan 5, 2006 11:04:44 GMT
..from the left corner of the feild, the elephant scores with a header that is totally amazing, basically cos he used his tusks. The crowd cheer and all drink their champagne. Now, slightly sozzled themsewlves, the two teams dribble up the field and dribble all over each other. The ref who, in reality is actually none other than.........
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 5, 2006 14:59:13 GMT
Hanibal Lecter, and feeling a little peckish, walks up to Julie and takes a bite out of a big, rounded, beautiful, pert............
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Post by Beau Leggs on Jan 5, 2006 15:17:29 GMT
...cannonball, which was left over from the Civil War.
Beau jumps on the elephant and continues in that great Scottish tradition of elephant polo. The elephant charges down the field...
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Post by Mike L.Iff on Jan 5, 2006 18:35:19 GMT
...cannonball, which was left over from the Civil War. Beau jumps on the elephant and continues in that great Scottish tradition of elephant polo. The elephant charges down the field... ...then charges up the field,collecting enough money to pay Beau to get off his bliddy back.With the cash stuffed safely in his hip pocket Leggsy .........
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Post by smiffy on Jan 5, 2006 22:14:51 GMT
Gets off the elephant, and goes to the beer tent.
Meanwhile, Nobbin saw all that happened and decided to try it, so he swiftly jumps on the elephant. The elephant was by now a bit fed up, so, he reached up with his long trunk and.....
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Post by nobbinthenob on Jan 6, 2006 0:50:34 GMT
...grabbed nobbins nobbin and asked him if he was excited. Nobbin groaned and fell off the elephant...straight into the arms of julie who, with a startled scream, dropped him in a pile of.....
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Post by Beau Leggs on Jan 7, 2006 2:50:38 GMT
...carpets. Nobbin asked Julie if she should like a short shag?
Obe was meanwhile in the now near empty stands inviting the fans to enter. It was at this time he was approached by a policewoman who said....
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Post by smiffy on Jan 7, 2006 9:40:05 GMT
Hello young man, may I be of assistance? Obe replied...
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 7, 2006 14:30:05 GMT
"would you mind explaining the offside rule to me" and the policewoman said..............
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Post by smiffy on Jan 8, 2006 6:54:11 GMT
Sure mr Obe, lets go into this quiet room, and settle down for a long
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Post by nobbinthenob on Jan 8, 2006 14:00:57 GMT
...chat on the meaning of life. Obe wrinkled his nose in disgust, and said " No thanks, I would rather you........."
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 10, 2006 18:16:14 GMT
get your hand round this and work it up and down", passing the young constable the bicycle pump she proceeded to ................................
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Post by nobbinthenob on Jan 11, 2006 12:02:58 GMT
...puff and pant very quickly and started to cry out "ooooh yes! Yes! it's getting bigger and harder!" Upon which they both smiled and realised the tryes were now at the correct pressure. Smiffy waltzed away with matilda, who was standing on a...........
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Post by Peter Doubt on Jan 11, 2006 19:49:11 GMT
..billabong. Meanwhile Obe turned back to the policewoman and casting caution to the wind started to mount..........................
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Post by smiffy on Jan 12, 2006 11:06:00 GMT
the elephant and tore down the outside of the field after the ball
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Post by bones2112 on Jan 12, 2006 12:06:12 GMT
but the elephant was not enjoying this and decided to stop dead in its tracks and would not budge and poor Obe was stuck on top, so Nobbin being a good friend then had to................
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Post by nobbinthenob on Jan 13, 2006 0:15:49 GMT
..shoot the elephant up the backside and send it.......
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